When Plans Change... for the Better
A detour, a sauna, and a lesson in letting go and finding flow
I love a good Korean sauna. There’s something about the intense heat, the quiet, the relaxation. It resets me in a way few other things can. So when I found out about Spa Light at Bally’s in Rhode Island—just an hour away—I was excited to share with my girlfriends. A perfect way to celebrate a friend’s birthday.
Our other friend called ahead and was told: 9am is best. That sounded… early. I floated the idea of finishing my regular workout before we left — drive at 9, arrive at 10? Friends were on board. But then doubt crept in. Was 10 too late? Should we leave earlier? I hesitated, then late the night before suggested a half-hour bump, but by then, it was too late to change plans.
The drive was peaceful—rare for me since I don’t drive all that often. But our perfectly-timed arrival was met with a rude awakening: Spa Light was at capacity. The last group had just gotten in. The wait? Three to four hours.
Now what?
Bally’s Casino was right next door, but the thought of weaving through cigarette smoke at 10am? Hard pass. Instead, we found a great little coffee spot nearby, regrouped over warm drinks.
“Should we just head back to Boston?” one friend asked.
I felt guilty. Sorry, I got us here late. But my friends waved it off. We were already here—why not make a day of it?
I searched and called out a few restaurants to my friends. No response from the group. I asked directly: What do you feel like?
“Something ethnic?”
We landed on an Indian place called… India Restaurant. It was a huge hit. My friends don’t eat Indian food often, so they were thrilled. For me, the food was good—but the presentation, the warm hospitality, and the fact that they’d raised money for Ukraine? Easy to see why they had a 4.8 rating.
What next? Someone suggested Brown University—next to the river, a nice walk. As moms with middle schoolers, we weren’t actively thinking about college, but also… we kind of were.
The campus was gorgeous. We wandered, talked, took in the energy of the place, strolled past RISD. Then, a call came in. There’s a spot!
Do we have time before my 5pm dinner plan, I wondered? My friends were still enjoying the day, so we went for it.
A wrong turn pushed our arrival to 2:30 PM, but once inside, it was everything I’d hoped for. Dry saunas, hot pools, deep relaxation. And yet, while my body melted into the heat, my mind buzzed.
I feel worried and a sense of guilt about being late to family gathering with my inlaws. I called my husband to check in. He immediately made the calcuation. “You’ve only been there an hour? There’s no way you’re making it to Quincy by 5. Just skip the family dinner and stay.”
O K… But I didn’t want to.
“I don’t need you to tell me what to do,” I said, “Just let me know if you can drive the other car, and I’ll meet you there late.”
And with that—I let go of the clock for a bit.
More sauna. More soaking. More being present.
When it was time to go, another twist. My friend clarified with me, “Oh, you have to drop us off first, then double back to the party. It’ll take you 40 minutes more to double back to Quincy.”
They offered to take the T instead. I felt the weight lift. “Are you sure?”
“Of course. Thanks for driving today.”
That little moment—friends looking out for me the way I tried to look out for them—made all the difference. I pulled into the family dinner just in time for the meal.
A whole day of adjustments, of changing plans, of letting go. And in the end, everything worked out better than I could have planned.